越来越不喜欢自己了

我越来越让人无法忍受了。我心眼小，优柔寡断，爱抱怨，悲观，一天永远找不到几件快乐的事。
其实都是自己逼自己的，我自己逼自己不快乐，于是就很不快乐。但我心里想快乐，我是被逼得不快乐的，所以我更不快乐了。
我发现自己越来越口齿不清了。我不知道我脑子都在想些什么，所以就不知道我在干什么。
人生路上，我还要走很久。

考试尾声

笔试快结束了，剩下的就是实验了。呵呵，无语。LX和WW两个白痴，整天说我虚伪。发个文章都被议论。
可能我人就是这样的，永远没自信。从来都没觉得自己考好过。
This is a torturing sensation. How I wish I can be stronger, happier and more confident.
What am I afraid of?
The compre paper sucks. I felt like dreaming during the exam. I don't understand the questions at all.
I didn't manage to finish my compos, either. I'm desperate. It's not about the mark. I'm just wondering whyI can never finish my compo in time, both English and Chinese. It's like I've tried to improve for 3 years and now I am still a failure. I'm really afraid of another failure. I'm afraid of trying anymore.
So pathetic.

哈5的壁纸

一直听人说Harry Potter 5里的人都长畸形了，今天看了看图片，发现Ron还是很可爱的。 Luna Lovegood很漂亮啊。她是我很喜欢的角色。Ginny长得的确不怎么样。

物理考砸了

我从未觉得生命中如此昏暗无光过。

其实考试前我还在想，如果没有什么大的问题的话我的物理应该是不会有什么问题的。虽然说物理从来都没拿过高分，但每次都很险地过了A1大关。我想这次应该也可以吧，不必提我考试前还作过了一些复习呢。

但是结果让人无奈。

有时我不知道我到底有没有头脑。

物理还有实验要考。

我总是把正确的答案改成错的。

天呐。如果我因此与华初失之交臂会怎么样？

生活像是被阴霾笼罩着。我不知道要怎么集中注意力。还需要考别的吗？I'm already lost

Before Prelim 14/8/07

Hold on. I know i am feeling frustrated now. I am. I want to go home. I just feel that i am really unable to face my exams. Is it that bad? Are exams that furious? Perhaps. I know, however, that the problem lies within me. I simply refused to take pressure. I seem to have denied myself even before e exams. I seem to be sure that i won't be able to do it. But i don't believe it. I have faith in myself. I must face the truth. Exams are coming. I know i am afraid and i think there's simply nothing wrong with being afraid. But on the other hand i also believe firmly that i must not give in to my fears. All the past, all that i've done wrong, just let it be. What i can master is only today. I cannot know what i will be in e future. Tomorrow is always a surprise. Life is never easy. Life is like a box of chocolate and you know what you will get till you open it. But, the most basic thing is that you must have e courage to open it. Now i know i must hold on to today. I 'm always e master. Yes. Study. I can and i'll make it. I'll make it to Hwachong. I'll definitely take e most satisfactory result home. That'll be a fact.

Oral 13/8/2007

Life is really miserable. I am feeling desperate by now. I keep telling myself that the oral exam is over and that i should not think about it any more. However i just cannot rest my mind. This is something that i have never anticipated. I am drowning. I cannot account for my failure. It takes less that 3 minutes to crash my dream, while i had been building that dream for half a year. Less than 3 minutes, can it ever make up for my hardwork? Impossible. I am in deep regret now. If only i had been clear, if only i hadn't been worrying about the time. I am too nervous. Can i ever get over it? Oh god please help me. I regret.

O Level English Oral 13/8/2007

I finally finished my o level english oral exam. I actually felt that i had done rather badly. I could only remember that i talked some unsystematical things. And i had done bad in my reading aloud. I felt like all my past practices on reading was in vain. My nervousness again betrayed me, leaving me such an unsatisfactory result. Speechless. Well okay. I still have a long way to go. They say people learn from mistakes. I now am only regretting that i hadn't made those mistakes before. Prelim is around e corner. Even if it's a part of the O Level, i really have no spare time for any failure that cannot be changed. Isn't that sad?