It's been a long time...since my last post. Really a long time. I've been lazy for some time. Just last week I though about closing this blog forever. But then when I looked at all those posts that I had written, I told myself to get up from laziness. Well, for the sake of my GP, I better starting writing something, though usually with grammatical mistakes, in English.
I could never write anything in English in XiaoNei. It's just that there are so many English pros of my ages moving around there, and even those people seldom use English. Thus my pride forbids me to write anything English there again.
There has not really been a significant change in my life up till now. School reopened, and I started repeating my tragedy all over again. School, hostel, hostel, school. Everyday I have work to complete. No normal TV programs. No Thunder. No relatives. Palpitations and immense anxiety are engulfing me. It feels like my heart is whacked suddenly. Maybe it is to do with my pressure, or my lack of confidence, or my sense of insecurity. I don't know why. Singapore is really driving me mad.
Last year I had a crush on somebody and now the feelings are almost drained. I even gave up my friendship with Zhao. I must admit my most irrational period comes when I talk to Zhao. He sucks yet I didn't want to stop the conversation. Now I'm glad I realized how strange he seems to me. Well I really can't figure out where this emotion thing is going. Headache.
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